


Of Strange Men And Kitty Cats

by caz251



Series: Creepy Kooky Spooky...Torchwood [22]
Category: Addams Family - All Media Types, Torchwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-10
Updated: 2013-02-10
Packaged: 2017-11-28 20:41:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 13,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/678682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caz251/pseuds/caz251
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Addams Family are heading up to Scotland to visit some family, leaving Gwen and Rhys to cat sit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own either the Addams Family or Torchwood, no matter how hard I wish it were so.

Ianto moved a few papers from the edge of Jack’s desk, setting them in front of him for him to sign, taking their place on the end of the desk. He wondered how he would get the other man to agree to what he wanted, he couldn’t just get something out of the box Andy directed them to every time he wanted something, it just wouldn’t be practical. He thought about the different ways he could broach the subject while Jack worked his way through the stack of paperwork. As Jack signed the last form he turned to Ianto, “What is it? Something’s not right with you at the moment.”

Ianto sighed, “I’m fine, but I need a few days off. The family are going up to Glasgow to visit with one of our cousins and are insisting that I join them.”

Jack just nodded, “When do you need off, I can work it out easily, on the condition that you do one piece of Torchwood business for me while you are there.”

Ianto looked at him; shock on his face at the fact Jack was going to allow him to go, “Wednesday to Saturday. What is it you need me to do while I’m there?”

It was Jack’s turn to look nervous, “It’s not dangerous, or anything.” Jack began, the ‘I hope’ wasn’t missed by Ianto. “I just need you to deliver some documents to Torchwood Two.”

Ianto let out a sigh of relief, “That’s all. Not a problem, sir.” He replied with a cheeky smile, “Anything sensitive?”

Jack let a lascivious grin cross his face at the question thinking of all the ways in which he could answer that question before replying, “Expense forms to be filled and some personnel files.”

“Personnel files, Two isn’t expanding is it?” Ianto queried, it was the first he had heard of it, and he was sure that he would have heard somehow.

“No. However, Archie is feeling the need for some reason to look over who I have on staff, with the exception of you. As he is just ‘curious’ or so he says I will allow it.” Jack answered.

Ianto snorted, curious was about right. He wondered what sort of things that Archie wanted to find out about Gwen, Owen and Toshiko, but then again he could probably guess. How the man had heard about the connections between Owen and Toshiko to the family was a mystery. Then again, Archienius was a mystery himself at times, the only living descendent of their great uncle Hartmut and he was just as mad as the mad scientist of the family.

“You do realise that he could access them without you sending him them, don’t you?” Ianto stated.

Jack just stared at him, waiting for him to expand upon his statement.

“Cousin Archienius is a better hacker than Toshiko, although don’t tell her I said that, she’d hurt me.” Ianto replied.

“Cousin?” Jack questioned. “Is there anyone else I should know that you’re related to?”

“Yes, cousin. And not that I can think of anyway.” Ianto replied. He knew he probably shouldn’t have just dropped that on Jack, but he had never found an opportune time before to tell him that the strange little man in Glasgow was his cousin.


	2. Chapter 2

Gwen was exhausted, it had been a long day for her, there was an explosion of rift activity and she had been stuck in the hub doing paperwork. She had finally been allowed to leave the hub once she completed her paperwork from the last fortnight, why she the second in command of Torchwood had to do paperwork she didn’t understand. Her intention had been to go home and have Rhys pamper her for a while and to have a carry out for dinner, she wouldn’t be trusting Rhys’ cooking again. Arriving home however her plans seemed to fall apart, sat on her sofa was one of the things that she had been attempting to keep away from her husband.

Sat on her sofa, clashing with the decor was Wednesday Addams. Looking at the girl who had already ruined her evening with her presence alone she was relieved to note that she wasn’t wearing the tarantula as a hair clip. Her relief was short-lived however when she noticed what was holding the girls plaits in place. The top of each plait was being held together by what looked like a spiders web, the bottom of the plaits were held the same, but they had an extra clasp as well in the form of two medium sized spiders. They reminded her of the hair bands she had as a child, the difference being that she had plastic princesses on hers, not real spiders.

Gwen entered the living room, doing her best not to glare at her husband’s cousin. Rhys wasn’t exactly happy with her at the moment anyway; there was no reason to antagonise him further. She quickly made her way to her husband giving him a quick kiss before enquiring about his day. There was no way that that Gwen was going to allow the little girl to think badly of her, she was the perfect wife. If only Rhys were the perfect husband, she used to think he was, but lately he was rebelling a bit.

She listened for Rhys to finish talking, there was no need for her to actually listen to what he said, it was never anything interesting. As soon as Rhys stopped talking she smiled, fake of course, as she forced out the words “that’s nice love.” She then turned her attention towards the teenager, muttering about how nice it was to see her again, while she thought about what it could be that the girl was in her home for.

While she didn’t particularly like any of her husband’s family, the girl Wednesday and her cousin Micah were the two that she really disliked. Micah had stabbed her and kept referring to Jack as her uncle and as Ianto’s boyfriend. Little Micah was no doubt being warped by her twisted family, Wednesday on the other hand was almost an adult and must be held accountable for her actions, Gwen was so why shouldn’t Wednesday be. The girl did nothing but interfere in her life, she had completely charmed her Owen away from her. Owen, since he had died and could only use one hand, had relied upon her a bit more. Now that Wednesday had fixed his hand Owen’s attitude towards her had reverted to what it had been like when she had called off their affair. She wasn’t annoyed that her workload had been cut, but Owen was treating her like a leper.

She smiled at Wednesday, although it was more like a grimace. “How are you, Wednesday? What are you doing here?” Gwen asked through gritted teeth, hating that she was having to attempt being polite to this teen.

Wednesday looked at Gwen appraisingly before answering, “I’m well cousin, how are you?”

Gwen stuttered out that she was fine, unsure as to whether or not she wanted to be referred to as a member of the Addams family or not. She noticed out of the corner of her eye that Rhys seemed pleased that Wednesday had accepted her, but she wasn’t sure if she was happy about it. The family were totally weird and she wasn’t sure that she a normal person should be a part of that; they may try to corrupt her or something.

Gwen tried to sit comfortably, but the young girl opposite her was creeping her out, she was staring at her intently and Gwen didn’t know what to make of her. “Gwen,” Wednesday began, “I was wondering if you would do me a favour. It turns out that we are leaving for Scotland to visit our cousin on Wednesday, but my pet kitty cat is arriving on Tuesday. He’s really well behaved and he’s housetrained, I was wondering if you would look after him for me. Rhys says that it is your decision, because you would have to move into the manor to look after him.”

Cat sit, that was all the girl wanted her to do, that couldn’t be too bad, and she would get to stay in the manor. She supposed it would help her cause to get the manor if she was there; she smiled at the girl before nodding. “We’ll watch him. Are you all going?” Gwen asked.

Wednesday nodded, “Yes. We are going to visit Cousin Archienius, it has been a while since we last saw him, he hides himself away with various little projects of his. Cousin Tharmus is coming with us, and Andronenkos has taken off without telling us where he was going.”

Gwen smiled internally, it would be perfect, she would be Lady of the manor at home, and at work there would be no Ianto getting in her way or trying to take Jack away from her. It would be great, if only it would last forever, it was then she realised that she had no idea how long they would be away for. “When will you be back?” Gwen asked Wednesday, her mind only half on the question as she thought about the great time she would have at the manor.

“We will be back on Saturday, we’re only really going for a few days to catch up with Cousin Archienius, not that he doesn’t seem to know everything that is going on with every member of the family anyway.” Wednesday answered.

Gwen just nodded, completely lost in the fantasy of herself as Lady of the Manor. She could completely redecorate the place to her tastes, something that she knew the family wouldn’t be able to stand, she was much more refined than they were.

“Do you want to come over on Tuesday before we leave so I can introduce you to Kitty Cat or would you prefer to just turn up on Wednesday?” The teenager asked.

Gwen thought about it for a moment, she knew the cats name and that he was a boy, she really didn’t need to be introduced to him. “No, it’s alright, Rhys and I can just come up to the manor on Wednesday, that way we won’t get in the way of your packing.” Gwen answered, glad that she had come up with an excuse that meant she wouldn’t need to see the family or share a building with them overnight.

Wednesday showed herself out not long after that having sorted out all the necessary details for Kitty Cat’s care. She had given Rhys a list of everything that needed to be done to take care of the cat. Gwen had just nodded along, knowing that it didn’t matter if she listened; it would be Rhys taking care of the cat anyway. Gwen couldn’t wait, she only had two days until the manor and Jack would be hers, as even if she split from Rhys she would keep the manor. After all she could take the manor as part of her divorce settlement couldn’t she; the family wouldn’t stop her for fear that she would expose their strange ways to the world.


	3. Chapter 3

Wednesday smiled a gruesome smile as she caught Kitty Cat as he ran towards her, Cousin Tharmus standing in the doorway a smile on his face as he watched the reunion. She had missed Kitty Cat something fierce while they had been away and it was good to see him again. She couldn't wait until she got back from Scotland to introduce him to Owen, she was almost positive that Kitty Cat would love him just as much as she was sure to. Now all that she could do was spend some time with him before she left for Scotland, something she was loathe to do regardless of how much she wanted to visit Cousin Archienius, it meant leaving her precious Kitty Cat in the care of Cousin Aluka and his wife. 

She had no worries about leaving him with Aluka, the man was competent in everything Addams except choosing his spouse, something that would be rectified, no her problem was Gwen. Kitty Cat was delicate and sensitive, and she was sure that Gwen would be completely useless when taking care of him, but there was no-one else. It wouldn't be fair to ask Owen, Tosh or Jack to look after him, they were far too busy, and Rhiannon Acantha had a family to look after. She had gotten a promise from Rhiannon though that she would drop in a few times while they were away just to check on Kitty Cat and see how he was getting on. Micah would love him, her little cousin was so much like her in many ways that it was startling, and she was sure that Kitty Cat would absolutely adore her. 

Kitty Cat nuzzled her cheek as she thought, turning her attention back to the cat in front of her. "You're much too thin boy, come on, let’s see what Grandmamma has for you." She led the way to the kitchen, Kitty Cat following dutifully behind her. After feeding him she offered him a tour of his new home, because that's what it was, although it was Rhiannon Acantha and Ianto Tharmus' manor, it was an Addams manor. The Addams family would never turn out a member of blood family, or approved family for that matter. She would be living at the manor for the foreseeable future until she managed to find somewhere just as charming for herself and Owen to live in. 

Taking Kitty Cat on the tour was amazing, just getting to spend time with him again. At times he would walk sedately at her side, and others he would prowl through the corridors looking for something to pounce on to protect her from. It was great to watch Kitty Cat in his element, and he was looking a lot healthier now than he had apparently been at the Kitty hotel. She was just glad that the staff had had the presence of mind to call them and have Kitty Cat sent to her. She knew that she was going away again and leaving Kitty Cat here, but at least he was in family surroundings and would have family nearby, and she was only going for a few days. When she got back she was determined to spoil him like mad. They entered the drawing room, Kitty Cat taking the lead and walking straight to where Tharmus was sat a huge book in his hands.

Kitty Cat sat at Cousin Tharmus' feet, looking up at him in expectation. Ianto sighed, looked down at the cat before he went into his pocket and pulled out a package placing it at his feet for Kitty Cat. Kitty Cat's face seemed to light up as he broke through the plastic to reach the steak within it. Wednesday smiled at the image that he presented, it was heart thawing to see him enjoying himself in such a way. She then turned to Tharmus to speak on important issues.

"Cousin Aluka has a key doesn't he, because I'm sure that we will have left before they arrive in the morning." Wednesday asked, and when Tharmus nodded she carried on, "Good. I just hope that Gwen is on her best behaviour, I really don't want her upsetting Kitty Cat."

Tharmus snorted, "She's bound to upset Kitty Cat in one way or another during her stay here, she upsets everyone else easily enough."

"You're right. Anyway, how was Kitty Cat on the way here, was he good?" Wednesday queried. She ignored the look from Kitty Cat that seemed annoyed at the thought that he would be anything but good.

"He was fine." Tharmus replied, "He walked at my side the whole time, and I didn't have to put his leash on him at all, in fact I'd say he was better behaved than usual. He didn't try to attack anyone, not even me, and that is normally the way he greets me, just a little nip to say hello."

"Hmm." Wednesday thought aloud, "He had been a bit under the weather, he should be fine now that he is home with me though. He's missed me, and he's been pining, I'm sure it's just a result of that, he has a very delicate constitution after all."

Kitty Cat looked up from the floor and his steak the picture of perfect innocence on his face. "Or maybe," Tharmus started, "He's just waiting for the right moment to start causing mayhem once more."

At that Kitty Cat drooped his head, he hated being caught out, he just hoped that the others weren't as perceptive as this Addams, the man just seemed to be able to read him, it was like the man knew everything.


	4. Chapter 4

Gwen smiled as she drove up the driveway to the manor, she was alone, but she didn't think that bringing anyone else was necessary, after all how hard would one little cat be to look after. She had convinced Rhys to go to work and she would take their things to the manor and look after Kitty Cat before going to work. It had worked perfectly and she had dropped Rhys off before making a quick trip to a hardware store. She bought a couple of tins of a lovely purple paint that she intended to use in the entrance of the manor to brighten it up a little. She had also stopped to get some cat food, after all she was sure that the Addams family didn't have anything suitable to feed a cat with, so it was up to her to go and get something to feed the cat with.  
She had the instructions for looking after Kitty Cat with her, but she didn't think that she would need them, a cat was a cat after all. She got out of the car when she reached the manor and quickly looked over them anyway. They were pretty self explanatory anyway, but at least she could say she had read the list if Rhys asked.

Don't interrupt Kitty Cat's naps  
Feed him four times a day  
His meals have to be healthy  
Do not take away any of his toys  
Do not aggravate Kitty Cat  
Keep Kitty Cat happy or else

She shook her head at the last one, the nerve of the teenager to threaten them if they didn't keep her pet happy, she shuddered at the thought of what the girl would do to her if the cat was even the littlest bit upset when she got back. She made a promise to herself there and then to do everything to make sure that the little cat was as happy as it could be. There was no way that she wanted to be on the receiving end of that girls ire, she had seen how bad she could be when she herself was happy, Gwen didn't need her interfering with her life anymore than she already had.

Gwen began taking the things into the manor, as much as she didn't like him she wouldn't have minded that terrible butler being around to carry her bags. She took her and Rhys' things up to their room first, picking the most ostentatious of the lot of them, after all the master bedroom was hers by right. She then took the cat food to the kitchen, emptying some of it into a bowl for the cat and yelling for him to come and get his breakfast. It wasn't long before she heard approaching paw steps, louder than she would have expected them to be. It was definitely not what she expected that entered the room. She quickly backed into a corner as the cat, who the hell would call that a cat, came towards her. It sniffed at the bowl between them, instantly turning its nose up at the cat biscuits there and startled to prowl towards her. 

Gwen was terrified; this thing was looking at her like she herself was breakfast. It sniffed her once before its nose moved to just the side of her, it obviously didn't want her as breakfast; instead it was sniffing at the fridge. It obviously wasn't a human eater like she had first thought when she saw Kitty Cat for the first time. She opened the fridge and Kitty Cat immediately pushed her out of the way, pushing his head into the fridge and coming out with a large steak that he took into a corner to chew on. Seeing that he was busy Gwen made her escape from the kitchen, stopping on the way out only to grab her bag. She locked the manor and made it back to her car in record time, driving off down the driveway in search of the nearest pet store, she had one more thing to buy for Wednesday's precious Kitty Cat; a muzzle.

Once she had the muzzle in her possession she drove straight to Harwood’s intent on giving Rhys a piece of her mind, why had he not told her that the little cat was actually a huge lion. She was going to kill him, she had been scared for her life, at least if he had told her beforehand she would have been prepared and could have taken steps to conquer her fear. She could have stayed home and let Rhys look after Kitty Cat, she had enough to deal with when it came to the aliens of Cardiff, she didn't need to go home to a monster as well. She found Rhys in his office talking to someone on the phone. She waited until he ended the call, it was only polite after all to allow them to get their business out of the way before she started yelling at her husband.

When he hung up he turned to her, "Oh hi Gwen love, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at work?" He asked her, looking through some forms on his desk as he spoke.

"I'm just going." Gwen replied, in a sweet voice. "I just thought I'd drop in on the way and let you know how your cousin’s pet is. Her Kitty Lion is just fine, but you could have warned me what I was going into. I brought you something that you will no doubt need when going in at lunch to feed him." She placed the muzzle down in front of him on his desk.

Rhys looked at her in shock, "Why would you buy Kitty Cat a muzzle? He doesn't need one, he's completely harmless." 

"Harmless. Rhys, that monster tried to eat me. He sniffed me and everything, looked at me like I was breakfast and you have the cheek to call him harmless." Gwen shrieked.


	5. Chapter 5

Ianto smiled as he got off the plane in Glasgow, Archienius was waiting for them and had brought a couple of cars for them to get back to his place of residence, a place that also doubled as the Headquarters of Torchwood Two. Ianto nodded at him in the professional sense, the man was after all his superior, and then gave him a hug that befitted the man’s station as a member of the family. People may think it was odd that he greeted him in two different ways, but he was an Addams and there were protocols that fell in with that, as well as the protocols concerning Torchwood as set out by the Institute. Torchwood came before family, but for an Addams family was above all, it was rather conflicting, but he and Archienius had settled on a balance. Greet as Torchwood then as family, be family then settle any Torchwood business, and it was a balance that seemed to work for them rather well, not that they had met often in a Torchwood capacity.

They got to Archienius home, a rather large flat that spread across the top three storeys of a high rise in the Sighthill area of Glasgow. Archienius seemed to have fixed it up to his needs using Torchwood's name to get a lot of things done. Ianto had to admit that he was impressed with Torchwood Two's set-up, but he was glad he didn't have to work there. It would be a nightmare bringing a weevil up to the top floor of this building, especially if the lifts weren't working, never mind trying to hide it from the neighbours. Regardless of that Archienius' set up was very professional, two whole floor were devoted to Torchwood while the top floor was split into his lab and his living quarters. That was where the family would be staying for the duration of their visit, and Ianto had to admit that he couldn't wait to see what his cousin was working on in his lab.

They were shown up to their rooms and then gathered together in the lab with drinks that Grandmamma had prepared for them, watching as Archienius talked them through one of his latest inventions, a paint stripper that would work as a body purificant. It wasn't something that Ianto personally would want to try on himself, but he could see that his Uncle Fester was considering it. They spent a great deal of time just catching up, Archienius playing ignorant to all that had been happening in the family recently, when Ianto knew that he was anything but ignorant. He seemed to be gathering information from the family before piecing it together with what he already knew, the man had an uncanny way of just knowing things. It was because of him that Ianto had been on his guard for the last few months that he had spent within Torchwood Tower.

The majority of the family decided to go off exploring, trying to find something entertaining for them to do, while Ianto and Archienius retreated to his office to discuss some 'Torchwood' business. Once they were sat in Archienius' office he turned to Ianto, "You brought the files then, Tharmus."

Ianto just nodded, "Of course I did." He placed the files on the desk in front of his cousin. "Do you want my personal opinion on each of them as well, or will the family's story and their files be enough?" Ianto asked, knowing exactly why his cousin wanted the files, he wanted to know everything that he could about those who were or would become family. 

"No, this will be enough to be going on with for the moment." Archienius replied, before he continued, "I do however wish to speak to you about your relationship with Harkness though. What did I tell you when you got the job with Torchwood, keep your family life private from Torchwood, it’s the only way of surviving in this job, and don't tell me it isn't. I know you nearly broke after Lisa." 

Ianto sighed, knowing that his cousin was right, getting involved with someone within Torchwood and then losing them had nearly broke him at the time, but he was an Addams and he was stronger than that. He had needed that experience to grow from, and he had learnt from it, and as a result he now had Jack. "There's nothing to tell. I'm with Jack that is all you need to know. We, our relationship, are nothing to do with Torchwood and we intend to keep it that way." Ianto replied.

Archienius just gave him a stern look, but the man backed off knowing that he would just put Ianto’s back up if he continued on in that vein. He didn’t really have a problem with their relationship anyway, even if Torchwood did become a part of it, and there was no way it couldn’t, both Jack and Ianto were Torchwood, it was part of them. No, he didn’t have a problem as such, he just didn’t want to have to kill Harkness repeatedly if he hurt Ianto, he actually liked the man and the fact that he had had the balls to stand up to Yvonne Hartmann.


	6. Chapter 6

“You’re late, Gwen.” Jack called as she entered through the cog door, as if she herself didn’t know that.

"I'm sorry Jack. I had to stop and buy a muzzle." Gwen called up to him where he was standing on the walkway. 

"A muzzle." Jack called back in surprise. "I didn't think that Rhys went in for that kind of thing." 

A snort from the medical bay told her that Owen was listening to their conversation.

"Oh shut up Owen." She yelled at him. "It was for your little girlfriend's pet. The stupid thing tried to bite me, the girl has no right calling that thing a cat." 

Owen laughed, "What was it a grouchy Siamese or something?"

"Hah, you should be so lucky. It's a bloody lion. She calls a lion a cat. The thing is huge and it had a steak for breakfast this morning, raw." Gwen replied. She turned at the quiet 'aha' from Jack turning to fix him with a glare that said, 'explain now or else'. 

"I just realised why Ianto went out to buy a lot of steaks, when Myfanwy and the weevil’s food is delivered weekly." Jack answered her look, not really intimidated by it at all.

Gwen huffed, before stomping over to her desk and throwing herself down into her seat. She did as little work as possible for the rest of the day, hoping that the others wouldn't notice, not that it would matter if they did she was second in command she was above them all, except Jack of course, but he wouldn't mind. She took a few breaks while they were all in the Hub just to spend some time alone with Jack in his office so that he didn't get lonely. After all just because they couldn't be themselves around their co-workers didn't mean they couldn't be friendly. She just hoped that he would fake a rift alert to send the others on so they could be completely alone for a while. Unfortunately it never happened and she went home to Rhys at the end of the night, back to the manor, only to find that Rhys had moved her things from the master bedroom.

She had pitched a fit when she found out what Rhys had done, especially when he had explained that they couldn't stay in that room as it was Ianto's. Why was it that Ianto had everything that she wanted, even when he wasn't there, it was driving her insane. She went to bed ignoring Rhys, she knew that he would apologise if she gave him the silent treatment for a while and that they would be back in the master bedroom before she got home from work the next day. She fell asleep before Rhys even entered the bedroom that night.

Gwen yawned as she woke up, feeling the heat of the bed beside her she knew that Rhys must have finished sulking and had come to bed. She was tempted to go back to sleep, after all if Rhys was still there it had to be early. Just as she was about to go back to sleep she caught sight of the alarm clock, it was already noon. She rolled over to wake Rhys up only to scream in horror, lying beside her was not her husband but the damned lion. She scrambled out of the bed quickly, her eyes watching the lion warily to see what it would do.

The lion seemed to blink, opening its eyes before stretching out like a human did, letting out a huge yawn as he did so. Gwen let out a squeak as she saw the huge teeth that the lion possessed. Kitty Cat’s eyes snapped towards her before he rolled over and off the bed, sauntering out the door without so much as a backward glance at her. Gwen let out a sigh of relief as the lion left the room, she wished she could force Rhys to look after it, but he must have left already.

She grabbed her phone, noticing that there were no missed calls or messages. She quickly text Tosh saying that she was ill, knowing that the other woman would tell Jack in a way that wouldn’t worry him. Deciding to take advantage of her unexpected free day she made her way out to her car, gathering the paint and rollers, she would have fun redecorating the manor to her specification. She put the paint down in the entrance hall, opening both tins so that Rhys wouldn’t be able to take either of them back.

Realising that she should eat when her stomach began to growl she made her way to the kitchen to find some food fit for human consumption. Kitty Cat had just finished another steak when she entered the room. She shooed him out of the room before working to make herself something to eat. About five minutes later while she was eating her dry cereal she heard a clang, but she didn’t think much of it, the stupid lion had no doubt dropped a suit of armour on itself.


	7. Chapter 7

Ianto and Wednesday stood off to the side as they watched Uncle Fester and Cousin Archienius mix some explosive with alien technology. It was a sight to behold, the explosions were magnificent. Pugsley and Pubert were trying to be included, but it seemed that the ‘grown ups’ were having too much fun to allow the kids to play.

“I wonder how Kitty Cat is coping with Gwen.” Wednesday pondered. “I hope he isn’t being neglected.”

Ianto smiled at her Kitty Cat was an Addams, he was family and they all cared about him. Wednesday had grown up with him though, he was as much hers as he was an Addams. “Kitty Cat will be coping with her just fine, at least she won’t expect him to hang on her every word, the curtains on the other hand.” He replied with a smile.

Wednesday looked at him still not completely convinced, “She may hurt him, Tharmus. Kitty Cat is defenceless to her.”

Ianto tried once more to alleviate her concern. “You can call Aluka tonight and speak to Kitty Cat. And Rhiannon Acantha is taking the kids to meet him tomorrow, she would call you if there was something wrong.”

She nodded before changing the topic of conversation, “So how are things with the Captain, can we expect an exchange of blood soon?”

Ianto thought about the question before answering. “Things are well between us, but I don’t think that we are quite ready for that yet.”

Wednesday snorted. “You live together and work together but you’re not sick of the sight of each other. You love him, the family like him, Micah’s claimed him as family and he loves you, but you don’t think you’re ready. Men.”

Ianto smiled at her tirade, Wednesday always told it as she saw it, it was something he loved about her. He had always thought of her as a little sister rather than a cousin and her opinion was important to him. He was glad to hear that the family liked Jack though, it was something that he had worried about a bit. “That’s it exactly. What about you and Owen?”

“He’s courting me. He asked Grandmamma permission and everything.” Wednesday stated sombrely, but to someone who knew her the undertone of glee was noticeable. “He’s supposed to be sending me daily letters for the first week of courtship so that we can get to know each other, but since I’m away we’re emailing instead.”

Ianto nodded, he knew the rules of courtship well, he was just surprised that Owen hadn’t come to him for advice on the matter. They continued to talk on a variety of different subjects for a while longer before an explosion caught their attention. Wednesday and Ianto rushed to the other members of their family, Wednesday to patch them up and Ianto to try and rescue the alien technology that was in the midst of the explosion. He wasn’t as good as Toshiko, but he was not slouch when it came to working with alien technology, his cousin had trained him well after all.


	8. Chapter 8

“Gwen, where the bloody hell are you?” Rhys yelled.

Upstairs in the master bedroom Gwen heard him, but she didn’t bother answering, she was too engrossed in what she had found. She had gone into the bedroom in the hope that she could find something to use against Ianto, instead she had found the box. When she had collected the box from Andy she had wondered why it was so heavy, now she knew, it was dimensionally spacious or whatever the phrase was; it was bigger on the inside. The box was a veritable treasure trove of adult toys. She would definitely have to go through it properly later when Rhys was out. There were a few things that she would love to have.

“Gwen, get your arse down here and bring that damn muzzle.” Rhys yelled up the stairs.

Gwen sighed as she heard him before leaving the master bedroom quickly; Rhys would have a fit if he found her in there. She grabbed the muzzle from where Rhys had thrown it the night before and made her way down the stairs. The sight that met her would give her nightmares. The beautiful and expensive purple paint she had bought was all over the floor with purple paw prints spread all over the place. Rhys was holding on to a lion that was covered in purple paint.

She approached them cautiously; as much as she liked the colour of paint she didn’t want it on her clothes. “Eventually!” Rhys snapped at her as he grabbed the muzzle from her hands. “Hold Kitty Cat so I can put this on him. We need to stop him from being able to lick himself.”

Gwen went to refuse but she caught the glare that Rhys sent her. She held the lion gingerly, watching as Rhys tried to stop it from licking it’s mane as he put the muzzle over its mouth. The lion wasn't very happy about being forced into a muzzle and kept struggling, covering Gwen in paint. Rhys finally calmed the lion enough to get the muzzle over its mouth, but not before he had covered Gwen in her expensive purple paint. 

She growled in her head at the audacity of the fur ball, first he spilt her paint and wasted it, now he was putting it all over her manor and her clothing. She stood abruptly when the muzzle was on the now wailing lion, really the thing should grow a backbone. "I'm going to shower and change. You can clean up the stupid lion's mess." 

Gwen was shocked when a hand reached out and grabbed her, pulling her back. The glare on Rhys' face terrifying, he had never looked at her like that before, he looked so angry, something that she had always thought Rhys incapable of. After all he was too soft in the head and too in love with her to ever get angry at her.

"No." Rhys commanded, "You will bathe Kitty Cat. This is all your fault Gwen, what was the paint for anyway?" 

Gwen glared back at him defiantly; there was no way that she would be bathing any lion, especially not this one. "I was going to brighten the place up a bit." She answered his question, "This place is so drab, I don't know how you can stand it here."

Rhys just glared at her, he couldn’t believe her nerve. He had been glad at first that Gwen had been willing to stay at the manor to watch Kitty Cat, he had been sure that she would have protested after her last visit, but now he saw her acceptance for what it was. This was Gwen’s attempt at a take-over. Rhys didn't know how he had missed it before, but he was sure aware of his wife's scheme now. Now that he stopped and thought about it for a moment he realised her plan all along was to gain control of the manor. She had practically indicated it to him the first night he had brought her there for the party and there had been several hints since. 

He would show her. He was an Addams, and as far as he was concerned although Gwen was his wife she was still a Cooper and a Williams until his family decided that she was an Addams. As such it was up to him to protect his families' interests, even against his wife.

Rhys let out a sigh before turning the full extent of his glare upon his wife. "This is not your home Gwen. Any changes in decoration to the manor are Ianto or Rhiannon's prerogative; it is their manor after all, left to them by their mother. Not mine, not the families’, and definitely not yours."

He pointed down the hall indicating that she should walk in front of him he brought Kitty Cat behind her, walking him to one of the ground floor bathrooms. He indicated the room that Gwen should enter, and instructed her to run the bath and get in. Rhys knew that she would complain about the order, and he was right; as soon as Gwen realised what he had said she started to whine, exclaiming that if she was to get in the bath her clothes would be ruined. 

He stared her down, it wasn't as if her whining had much of an effect on him anymore, and she got into the bath without much further complaint. Helping Kitty Cat into the bath was a lot easier than getting Gwen in though, despite his feline nature Kitty Cat had always held a fondness for water.

“Make sure you wash him thoroughly Gwen. If he still has paint on him that he can lick he may get ill. I doubt that Wednesday would be impressed if that were to happen.” Rhys warned, watching as Kitty Cat splashed water at Gwen. “And once he is clean, you can start on the entrance hall. It will need to be cleaned before Rhiannon arrives in the morning.”

Rhys made his way out of the bathroom, calling back over his shoulder that he expected it all to be done by the time he got back with dinner. At that he left the manor, heading into Cardiff, after the day he’d had and the trouble his wife had put him to he deserved a kebab.


	9. Chapter 9

Wednesday sat in her cousin’s parlour, a room bedecked in heavy black fabrics, with very little light in the room. The antique phone at her side just waiting to be picked up, Aluka was supposed to call her when he got home from work; she had left him a message. He hadn’t called. Something must be wrong, she thought, her hand reached for the phone, dialling the number that she had memorised. The phone rang for a minute before it was picked up, the person on the other end panting like a rhinoceros.

“Yeah.” The voice spoke, Wednesday recognised it easily as that of Gwen Cooper, the woman who had somehow trapped their Aluka into wedlock.

“Gwen, its Wednesday. Is Aluka around? He was meant to call me.” She spoke into the telephone, holding back her need to speak to Kitty Cat until she had spoken to her cousin and found out why he hadn’t contacted her.

“Erm. No. Not at the moment. He’s just nipped out to get dinner. Was there something that I could do or can I take a message?” The answer came down the phone.

Wednesday deliberated for a moment, she had wanted to speak with Aluka to find out what had happened, but if he wasn’t there she would just have to speak with him later. “Can you put Kitty Cat on please?”

She could hear the amused disdain in the snort that Gwen let out at her words, but she ignored it in favour of getting to check on her Kitty. Down the phone line she could hear Gwen trying to convince Kitty Cat to do as she told him, obviously to no avail. She sighed, this would take forever if she had to rely on Gwen, although it was understandable that Kitty Cat wouldn’t listen to her orders; the woman wasn’t worth listening to, let alone competent enough to give orders. Giving in Wednesday let out a high pitched whistle down the phone line, and within seconds she heard a purring that could only be associated with her Kitty Cat. 

She spoke to him varying her tone so that he would understand what she wanted to know, Kitty Cat was smart and she had taught him from a young age to understand the nuances of her speech. The conversation was enlightening, and she felt better about having left him behind once they had spoken. He was having fun, and Gwen hadn’t harmed him, and he had plenty to eat.

Hanging up the phone Wednesday wondered about the harried sounds that had been Gwen, she wondered what had got the woman so upset in a way. It was obvious from the sounds the woman made in the background that she was not in the best state. Wednesday couldn't help but wonder if she had perhaps found one of the bear traps that she had left in the upstairs bath tub. It would be a shame for her to find that when no-one else was around, Wednesday wanted an account of what happened.

She let a smug smirk cross her face at the thought of Gwen finding some of the presents that she had left just for her. Getting up she left the parlour to join the rest of her family in the lab, they were watching Cousin Archienius give a demonstration on how to make an explosion out of household goods. After all a candle, an alarm clock and some celery were just normal things that were kept in a house, it was only appropriate that they be aware of how to create an explosion with tools readily available to them. 

"Kitty Cat's fine." Wednesday stated as she entered the room, the family letting out a sigh of relief at the words. "Gwen didn't sound too great though. I wonder what Rhiannon Acantha will have to tell us tomorrow when she calls us." 

The family sat for a while longer, discussing the various things they had left in the manor when Tharmus stood abruptly and left the room. There was something wrong with him, it was obvious to Wednesday by the fact that he hadn’t mentioned the pellets that he had left in the instant coffee. She quickly excused herself, following her cousin down the hall to his room. She didn’t enter, but she could hear him on the phone, no doubt he was talking to his Captain.

“Dammit Jack! What the hell are you doing?” Tharmus began, his voice carrying out into the hallway. “We agreed not to use anything from the box when not together. Especially those.” He hissed down the phone line.

Wednesday couldn’t hear the reply, but she did note the sound of panic in her cousin’s voice as he gasped out, “They’re still at the manor. But, then...Gwen!” Tharmus let out a horrified shriek.

Not able to stand the thought of her cousin in pain because of the harlot Wednesday swooped into the room, hoping to find out what was wrong and how she could fix it. Tharmus hung up as she entered the room, curling into the foetal position as he did so, clutching himself protectively. “What is it?” Wednesday asked, straight to the point.

Tharmus shook his head, “Jack’s fixing it. Everything will be fine.” At the look on her face however he continued, “Our toy box has been opened, and it feels like someone is slobbering all over me like a dog does.”


	10. Chapter 10

Gwen groaned as she hung up the phone, the damned girl had spoke to her kitty cat and now the lion appeared to be pining, if it was possible to pine and growl at the same time. The lion backed her towards the stairs, at which point Gwen turned and ran up them as fast as she could, making her way to the Master bedroom and shutting herself in. The box was exactly where she had left it earlier, and now with Rhys out of her way for a while and the fact that she would have no more interruptions she started to rake through the box. 

She found what she had been hoping for after a few minutes; Jack had once mentioned some future toys that would make exact replicas of whatever parts the material was applied to. Inside the box where two toys, not much different in length and thickness, she pulled them out. After studying them for a few minutes she chose the one that was slightly thicker, Jack was always talking about how big he was, before trying to fit in her mouth. It wasn’t possible for her use the toy in her mouth the way she wanted to, so instead she began to give it short teasing licks before trying again; after all she would need to get used to the toy before being able to take the real thing.

Gwen sat on the floor playing with the toy for a while, fervently wishing that it was the real thing when she felt someone else’s presence in the room with her. Looking up she was surprised to see Jack in front of her, his hand closing his vortex manipulator. It was obvious to her that he had teleported to her, he must have been worried about her after Toshiko told him that she was ill. Her thoughts were confirmed in her mind when he yelled out her name to get her attention, the worry in his tone was obvious.

He stalked towards her, his powerful stride hypnotic as he came closer, she could watch him walk all day. Mere seconds after he teleported into the room was standing in front of her, he grabbed the toy out of her hands and placed it gently into the box after giving it a series of what appeared to be random taps. He then closed the box completely before turning to her, his eyes burning through her.

Gwen shivered at the ill-concealed lust in his eyes, lust for her, and smiled up at him with her gap-toothed smile. She was completely unprepared for the tirade that he let loose. Expecting a declaration of love, or at least happiness at her skill with her mouth, the complete and utter fury was startling and very confusing. In his anger his tirade wasn’t making much sense and she only caught a few words every now and again, but she had heard the words “nobody...Ianto’s...MINE”. 

Deciding to put a stop to his angry rambling Gwen pouted, looking up at him with the best alluring look that she had, “Jack, I know you enjoyed it. Why are you so upset?”

Jack turned to her, throwing her an incredulous look, how the woman didn’t get why he was so angry he didn’t understand. “Wouldn’t you be upset if you found out that I’d forced myself on Rhys?” He asked, hoping that she would understand the comparison, but not holding out much hope.

Gwen looked up at him, a confused expression plastered across her face. She didn’t know why exactly Jack was asking her this, but she thought about the question anyway. “I’d be furious.” She replied eventually. She would be furious that he would want Rhys when he could have her, but she realised that the question was completely hypothetical, after all why would Jack of all people want Rhys.

“Exactly.” Jack bit out. “Surely you understand now.”

At Gwen’s blank look he sighed, he opened the cover on his vortex manipulator ready to teleport away before he tried to make Gwen understand by shaking her or something. He picked up the box, determined not to allow Gwen anywhere near it again, then turned to her once more. “You wouldn’t want me to force myself on Rhys, why would I want you to force yourself on Ianto, especially when he is not physically there to protect himself.” Pressing a few buttons on his vortex manipulator Jack teleported out of his and Ianto’s bedroom back to their flat, ignoring the look of shock on Gwen’s face, he needed to call Ianto back.

Gwen sat on the bedroom floor a look of stunned rage on her face as she realised that it wasn’t Jack that she had been practicing on, but Ianto. It just wasn’t fair, the one chance that she had to get a feel of how she and Jack could fit together and she had ended up with Ianto instead. She got up as her stomach growled; she headed off in the direction of the kitchen, hoping that Rhys was back with some food. It occurred to her as she descended the stairs that Jack’s anger was probably because she had been intimate with Ianto instead of him, if only he hadn’t taken the box with him she could have made him feel better.


	11. Chapter 11

Ianto let out a groan as he began to wake up, he hated mornings, especially mornings when he woke in an empty bed. He had been half-tempted the night before when Jack had been on the phone to ask the man to make a quick trip up to Scotland with his vortex manipulator to keep him company, but he had thought better of it. He wasn’t sure what his cousin would do if he wandered into Ianto’s room and found him with Jack, Archienius wasn’t exactly happy about the relationship between them. Ianto was loathe to give Jack up though, especially not because they were Torchwood, there was no way that he would allow his job to take away his love life. He knew that his job was a lot more important than some others, but that just made his need to keep his relationship with Jack more important. After all the harder you work, the harder you play.

Hearing a beeping he turned to his side, grabbing his phone off the bedside table he opened the text that had just arrived.

Morning <3  
J x

Sending a quick text back Ianto pulled himself out of bed, readying himself for the day. He didn’t know what the family had planned for the day, but he was sure that it would be eventful anyhow. Making his way to the dining room he noted the family sat around, helping themselves to some of Grandmamma’s delicious food. He helped himself to breakfast, querying as he did what the plan was for the day. It seemed that the family were all splitting up to do different things, Pugsley and Pubert were going down to the nearby graveyard for a game of wake the dead and Grandmamma and Aunt Morticia were going shopping. Ianto shuddered at the idea of shopping with the two women and quickly declined when he was asked if he wanted to join them. Uncle Fester and Cousin Archienius had already secluded themselves in Archienius’ lab, and Ianto really didn’t want to know what they were doing. 

Once they were finished with breakfast the rest of the family cleared out of the dining room, leaving Ianto with his Uncle Gomez and Wednesday. Wednesday was sat with her laptop, replying to Owen’s email of the day, the phone mere inches from her hand. She was looking rather anxious and Ianto could tell that she was waiting for Rhiannon to phone with news from the manor. Ianto was about to ask her to take a walk round the graveyard with him to take her mind off the coming phone call when his uncle caught his eye and indicated that he shouldn’t. 

He followed his uncle out of the room when he beckoned him to follow him, they made their way through the building to Archienius’ training room. Once inside Gomez threw him a sword and indicated that he should take a fighting stance. Ianto quickly fell into the routine of the practice fight, it had been a while since he had practiced seriously; he and Jack had tried a few hours of practice after the party and Jack’s fight with Gomez, but that had been more foreplay than anything else. The dance in which he and his uncle were partaking in was familiar and Ianto had to admit that he missed it, he really needed to practice more often, it wouldn’t do for either him or his sword to go rusty.

“She’s nervous.” Gomez spoke up. “She was asked to join everyone else in what they were doing and she snapped at them all, I thought I’d save you the experience.”

Ianto just nodded. His cousin wasn’t one who got nervous normally and as a result when she did feel unsettled or emotional she tended to react in a rather violent manner. He had to admit that he was looking forward to watching the first time that Owen manages to annoy her past calming, the man would probably end up hidden in one of his mortuary drawers or in one of the cells.

“Is she still worried about Kitty Cat?” Ianto asked, having noticed Wednesday’s hesitation to move far from the phone.

“Yes.” Gomez replied. “And about the corpse. The more she tells him about herself the more nervous and worried she becomes.”

Ianto was silent for a moment, thinking on what his uncle had told him. “She’s worried that he will change his mind about the courtship the more he gets to actually know her. He won’t. Owen is stubborn, and when he wants something he will go to any length to get it.” Ianto assured his uncle thinking about Owen’s desire to get Diane back from the rift, or his continued search for answers for Katie.

Gomez seemed a bit less morose after that, it was obvious to Ianto that the man was worried about Wednesday, to be honest he was as well. Not because he thought that Owen would hurt her, but because he wasn’t sure that Wednesday wouldn’t hurt herself. She was a proud girl, and was unlikely to ever ask for help, but he knew for sure that she had never dealt with strong positive emotions. He didn’t think that she would be unable to cope, she was an Addams, but he knew that the range of emotions that she would come to experience could become overwhelming for her. “She’ll be fine.” He spoke confidently, as he realised what his cousin would do to him if she thought he was doubting her or her abilities in any way.

“So how is your Captain?” Gomez asked as he thrust his blade forward in a sharp motion that Ianto only just managed to dodge, distracted as he was by the question.

“Jack is fine.” He answered, unsure of where his uncle was going with the question and deciding to settle for a straightforward answer in the hopes that the man would come quickly to the point instead of leading him through a verbal dance as well as a physical one.

Gomez gave a small snort at the answer, knowing that his nephew obviously wasn’t in the mood for games he asked straight out. “When will the bonding be?”

Ianto paused as the question penetrated his brain, unsure as to why the family were all so concerned about his and Jack’s relationship. Archienius wasn’t happy that it existed, but the rest of the family all seemed to be trying to get him and Jack to an altar. “We haven’t discussed it, but I doubt we will bond though.” Ianto replied, unable to sound completely happy about the fact. “Jack would never be interested in something permanent like that.”

Gomez shook his head mentally, but didn’t say anything. The boy was daft, he had seen the way that the Captain looked at him, and the man looked as though he cut off his own feet to be allowed to spend time in Ianto’s presence. The man was not completely stupid and had realised almost immediately that Ianto’s family played a large role in the lives of the individual members. He had made sure that he was liked by the family, the man had gone out of his way to be accepted at the party. Not only that but Gomez knew that there was already a partial bond between the two men, Thing was never wrong. He just wondered what the bond meant for Ianto in regards to Death.


	12. Chapter 12

Rhiannon Acantha walked up the front steps of her ancestral home, her children running ahead of her, both excited to meet the family pet. She had to admit she herself was excited, it had been so long since she had seen Kitty Cat and he was bound to be bigger now, the last time she had seen him Wednesday had only been five. She was not however looking forward to seeing Gwen, the woman was a nightmare, she just hoped that she was at work. Following the children into the manor she realised that her wishing was all for nought. Rhys was stood just inside the entryway directing Gwen who was on the floor with a bucket and rag cleaning something off of the floor. Rhiannon couldn’t help but wonder what she was cleaning, and what had happened that Rhys was standing over her like a drill sergeant, making sure that she actually cleaned. 

“Aluka.” She greeted her cousin warmly, using his Addams name, having easily figured out at the party how much it annoyed Gwen. “Did you happen to see which way my wayward children went?” She asked, the kids having scarpered as soon they had got inside. Whatever the answer to the question was it was not necessary as a shriek of hilarity was heard and Kitty Cat came trotting into the room with Micah and David on his back, his mane and his tail a vibrant purple. Raising her eyebrow at Aluka he just shrugged before glancing quickly in the direction of his wife and back, informing her without words that it was Gwen’s doing.

She wondered whether the cleaning was Gwen’s punishment, she was sure that the other woman was one to despise such menial chores as scrubbing floors. She made her way further into her manor, stopping to pet Kitty Cat and welcome him home. She informed him with all seriousness that as an Addams the manor was his home and that he should make himself comfortable. Noting the purple paw prints on the floor, the rug and partial prints on the walls she chuckled before commenting that she sees that he had already begun. Complimenting the lion on his artwork seemed to have been the right thing to do as he started to purr happily and Gwen started to fume.

Rhiannon was rather annoyed at the woman’s presumptuousness as she was sure that it had been her who had brought the paint into the manor, probably in some attempt to redecorate and take over. The manor wasn’t hers though and it never would be, even if she did stay with Aluka and gain the families approval. The manor would go to Micah and David and to Ianto’s children if he ever got around to reproducing. While she wouldn’t do anything drastic without Ianto’s input, she had to do something about the other woman, it was a slight on her if she didn’t defend her home.

“Aluka dear, entertain the children would you. They could do with some practice of some of their lessons. Stealth and Evasion, I think today, if you please.” Rhiannon spoke, before turning her attention to Gwen, “How about us two get something to drink and get out of their way? I make a great cuppa, not as good as Ianto’s of course, but I’m learning.”

Rhiannon smiled a predatory smile as Gwen agreed, she motioned that the other woman should precede her into the kitchen. Once there she indicated that Gwen should sit, explaining that they only had instant coffee at the moment as Ianto wouldn’t let anyone else use his coffee machine. Gwen had nodded, mentioning that he was exactly the same at work and that they learnt to cope with instant if necessary.

Rhiannon quickly prepared Gwen’s coffee before measuring out a glass of Iron Brewed for herself and taking them over to the table. Sitting down she began to grill Gwen, asking first how she enjoyed staying in her manor and if everything had been acceptable for her during her stay. Rhiannon chuckled inwardly as she watched the woman try to be polite about the manor and her stay, all the while knowing that she hated the decor and that her stay had been terrible. Wanting to get straight to the point Rhiannon spoke cutting across the woman and her babbling, “It was nice of you to provide some paint for Kitty Cat so that he didn’t get bored, but in future if you refrain from trying to make changes to my manor, it won’t work.”

She didn’t wait for a reply she left the room, smiling to herself as she spotted Rhys sat on a couch reading a book, her children must be around somewhere. “David.” She called out. “That coat stand should only have two human legs, not four.” A snort alerted her to Micah’s presence above her. “Micah dear, if you are going to hang above someone you need to be quiet.”

Rhys chuckled from his position on the couch, and knowing that he was thinking of a similar occurrence years before when she had been hung above him only to start coughing as she swallowed some dust that had come from the ceiling. She snorted herself thinking about it, things had been so much simpler when they had been younger. She smiled at her children, “Go play brats.” She said and they rushed out of the manor towards the swamp, Kitty Cat bounding after them.

She sat catching up with Rhys, they didn’t get much time to talk to each other anymore, and it was something she missed, she had always enjoyed spending time with her cousin. They were at the manor for a few hours before she insisted that it was time to leave, the children needed to be fed and she had to phone Wednesday. She reminded herself to ask her brother what exactly it was that he had put into the instant coffee, all she knew was that whatever it was hadn’t taken affect by the time she had left, even though she had stayed longer than intended so that she could witness the chaos.


	13. Chapter 13

Archienius Addams stared around at the family members that had come to visit him, it had been a while since he had seen some of them. He had seen Tharmus every now and again as a result of Torchwood business, but it had been years since he had seen the others. He had especially liked the time that he had spent with Fester, they were so alike in some ways and he was glad for the appearance of a willing human test subject. While he had been able to test some of his more innocuous brews he wasn’t completely sure about the difference it would have with human physiology over alien.

He would be sorry to see them go, but he knew that they had other things that needed to be done, and that young Wednesday was anxious to get back to Cardiff and on with her courtship. At first he had been worried about so many members of the family getting involved with Torchwood, but not so much anymore. Harkness’ Torchwood was much more in line with his own than with Yvonne’s and he knew that Tharmus no doubt had extended some control over the other man. Knowing that it could be a while before he saw any of the children again he resolved himself to spend the remaining time that the family were there with them. 

Gathering Tharmus, Pugsley, Wednesday and Pubert into his lab he began to teach. He had always enjoyed working alone, but he must admit to having a fondness for passing on his knowledge of alien technology and Addams ingenuity. Tharmus was already skilled in many of the things that he showed the children, but a refresher course never hurt anyone. Wednesday was interested in what he was showing them, but it was obvious that she was more like her mother and interested in biological progress in the form of creatures. Pugsley and Pubert on the other hand appeared enraptured by the whole experience, and by the time they left the lab both boys were extracting a promise that they would be allowed to visit again sometime soon.

The family all gathered in the dining room for lunch before they had to leave to go back to Cardiff, one thing he would miss when they left was Grandmamma’s cooking, he’d spent the last couple of days eating like a King, and that was about to all disappear. Lunch was a rather boisterous affair, but Archienius couldn’t find it in himself to be upset about that, instead he dug in heartily to his toadstool soup.

As lunch came to a close Archienius escaped down to his office, retrieving the files that he had borrowed from Harkness and the device that would take the family home. He handed the device to Tharmus when he returned, quickly explaining how to work it before making his way to speak with Wednesday, knowing that she would be the first to leave so that she could get back to her Kitty Cat. They spoke for a few moments before she left with Tharmus, before starting to make his way around the rest of the family to say his goodbyes. Tharmus reappeared and took each member of the family home until it was just Tharmus, Grandmamma and Archienius left in the dining room.

His conversation with Grandmamma while they waited for Tharmus was interesting, and he was pleased to hear that she had filled his freezer with meals she had prepared for him. The old woman seemed to know too much, and she wasn’t exactly happy that he often forgot to eat when he got into one of his experiments. When Tharmus had returned Archienius handed over the files, informing him that he couldn’t disagree with the families own assessments of the situation, and that they should keep an eye on Aluka’s wife. Tharmus had just nodded before taking hold of Grandmamma’s hand and teleporting them away back to Cardiff.

Archienius smirked as the disappeared, wondering how long it would take for Tharmus to find his message. He retreated quickly into his lab, taking with him the leftover soup from lunch. He had a piece of technology that he was desperate to study waiting for him, he’d put it off in the last couple of days due to the families visit, but now he couldn’t wait to find out what he could learn.


	14. Chapter 14

Kitty Cat prowled around the manor, looking for something to do, since the children had left the day before there hadn’t been much to do. The woman had retreated to her room and Aluka had spent some time in the kitchen cooking. While he had gained quite a bit of food from sitting at the man’s feet and purring it wasn’t terribly exciting. Now however he was looking to alleviate his boredom, he didn’t want to upset his Wednesday by having destroyed anything because he was bored.

A slight breeze caught his attention as he walked past the door to the drawing room, a window was open and the thick velvet curtains were swaying in the breeze, the tassels of the curtain ties calling out to him. Bounding into the room Kitty Cat made his way straight to the curtains, ignoring the person sat in the chair opposite the fireplace. The tassel was so tempting and Kitty Cat soon found himself lying on his back all four paws in the air as he tried to capture the elusive cord. Finally capturing the tassel in his paws he let out a small roar of accomplishment.

Having caught the tassel it then held less of an appeal to him, so he started looking around the room for something else to amuse himself with until his human came home. It was then that he noticed the person sat in the chair, it was the woman who had brought him the paint, but she was different, she was brown. He let out a howl at the sight, he wasn’t easily scared, he was an Addams, but the sight in front of him unnerved him.

Mere minutes later Aluka was in the room with them, he’d come in to find the woman yelling at him, something about interrupting her concentration. Aluka had quickly taken control of the situation as the woman turned orange, leading her out of the room. Kitty Cat followed closely behind them, watching as the woman was led to one of the glass things that showed yourself. The scream that she emitted hurt his ears and he let out a whine of displeasure as the woman turned a bright red.

While she was hurting his ears Kitty Cat had to admit to himself that the situation was hilarious, he could see that Aluka thought so as well, the other man trying to stifle his laughter at the sight of the woman. She finally let out a growl and stomped off towards her bedroom, and Kitty Cat let out an amused growl. Aluka just chuckled as he scratched Kitty Cat’s ears, the lion letting out a purr. When the man started to walk away Kitty Cat followed him, walking out of the manor onto the grounds towards the swamp.

Kitty Cat spent the next few hours playing around the swamp, occasionally putting his paw in to catch some delicacy to eat. He stayed out there until just after lunchtime when he heard a voice calling to him from the manor. He bounced back up the steps into the manor and into the arms of his human who was waiting for him just inside the door. His Wednesday was home.

He purred as she clapped him, before he informed her of his antics while she had been away, he was by no means unintelligent, and his human understood him well enough. He prowled around the room, sniffing at each member of the family as they returned to the manor, making sure that everyone was who they were claiming to be. He was an Addams and family was important, they looked after him, and he would look after them.

Brown – random thinking/troubled  
Orange – annoyed  
Red – alarmed/anger


	15. Chapter 15

Ianto Jones let out a sigh of relief after he teleported back to the manor for the last time today, he was sure that even just one more trip would have resulted in some teleportation sickness. He had teleported straight into his bedroom so that if he was ill from the amount of teleportation he had undertaken in the last ten minutes or so then he wasn’t up for public scrutiny. It also gave him the chance to put the files in his briefcase ready to be taken back to the hub the next day. Sitting on his bed he opened the files, checking to see whether or not Archienius had added any additions to the files, it was just the sort of thing that the other man would do.

The files themselves had not been altered in any way, something that had surprised Ianto in a way, he had expected his cousin to add his own thoughts about the others to the file. There was however a post-it note stuck to the first page in the first file telling him that they should keep the teleportation device in their secure archives in case they ever needed it. The note also informed Ianto that Archienius approved of Jack, something that he definitely hadn’t been expecting. He had expected his cousin to at best ignore his relationship with Jack, not to approve.

He smiled at the post-it, taking it out of the file and placing the files and the device into his briefcase and placing the post-it to the side. Taking out his phone he sent Jack a quick text telling him that he was home before heading downstairs. As he reached the bottom of the stairs he was pounced on by a partially purple lion who growled playfully at him before trying to nibble on his fingers. Ianto chuckled as he scratched the top of Kitty Cat’s head. “Feeling better are we?” He asked, Kitty Cat letting out a small roar in response.

He ignored the purple mane and tail, Rhiannon having already informed them of Kitty Cat’s adventure with some paint, and instead followed the lion into the drawing room where the family had gathered discussing Gwen’s predicament. He almost snorted when he caught sight Gwen who was sporting a much darker shade of purple than the one that Kitty Cat was wearing. Gwen had always shown her emotions easily, and was always going on about how emotions made them human, he couldn’t help but wonder what she thought of her emotions now that they were displayed in colour, not that he would ask.

The pellets that he had put in the coffee were simple enough to make, in fact he had succeeded for the first time as a child, and he knew that Micah and David were capable of making them. Every member of the family had tried their hand at them at some point, and they all knew how to create the antidote. It amused him therefore that the family were all sat around deliberating about a solution to the woman’s problem. What amused him all the more was the fact that Rhys was the one who was leading the rest of the family with the deception. Maybe the other man was beginning to wise up to his wife’s antics.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by the feel of arms slipping around his waist. He turned to see Jack behind him and was about to greet him when the other man pulled him into a kiss. As the kiss broke he heard Jack mumble ‘missed you’ at him before he greeted the rest of the room as a whole. Ianto just smiled, turning back to say goodbye to his family when he caught sight of Gwen who was an awful combination of both red and green. He bid his family goodnight before leaving with Jack, putting all thoughts of Gwen’s anger and envy out of his mind.

Purple – infuriated  
Green – envy/jealousy


End file.
